


Bloom

by GravityDefyingHair



Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Hanahaki Disease, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, can you believe that doesn't have a legit tag on this website?, hanahaki, talking about feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-27
Updated: 2018-03-27
Packaged: 2019-04-06 17:31:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14061888
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GravityDefyingHair/pseuds/GravityDefyingHair
Summary: When Junkrat starts coughing up flowers, he decides something needs to change. Roadhog just tries to keep Junkrat from killing himself before the disease does.





	Bloom

**Author's Note:**

> Overwatch is a strange universe to write for. It's so ambiguous sometimes that you could literally write anything for it, but at the same time it has all these story lines that aren't actually in the game. It took so long for us to actually get anything about Junkertown, and at the same time we still don't know a lot about it. So everything in this story is vague as hell and I hope the rest makes up for it.

Jamie doesn’t think much of it the first time it happens. He just thinks he’s coughed up a bit of his insides, which is expected at a certain point when you live in the Outback.

He and Roadhog have been living together for a while by then, and for the most part things are professional. They keep to their own rooms, their own schedules. Roadhog sleeps during the night while Junkrat works in his shop. He only crashes on his sofa when he knows for sure that Roadhog is awake, and even then he makes sure that the doors are secure and no one’s going to get to him without going through Roadhog first.

But when Roadhog is asleep, Junkrat stays alert. He whips around at every creak he hears and makes sure that he has plenty of ammunition at the ready. Their home is something other covet. It wouldn't be the first time it was attacked...

He’s working on Roadhog’s scrap gun when he starts coughing. He grips the side of his work bench with his right hand, the left covering his mouth to at least try and muffled the sound. He does his best to keep his eyes open and darting around just in case someone sees it as an opportunity to take him out.

No one breaks down the door, and Roadhog continues to snore from where his bed is. The coughing fit passes, and Junkrat can’t help but giggle at his paranoia. Soon though, his quiet laughter dies when he realizes there’s something in his hand.

When Jamie looks at what was lodged in his throat he blinks at it, not recognizing what it really was. It was soft and pink, with thin veins visible on the surface. From there Jamie can only make one conclusion:

A piece of him broke off.

This wasn’t any sort of shock. If anything, it was later than expected. Jamie had a longer life than most who grew up on their own in the face of the Omninium blowing. He’d knew he was on borrowed time at this point, he'd survived 25 year with only having lost two limbs. He’d really just hoped he’d be killed by something a bit more exciting than what he was being given…

He chucks the pink thing over his shoulder and goes back to work.

No reason to panic just yet… It was just a sliver really. No blood or nothing.

Everything is fine.

It's not long before he starts to cough up a small bit once a week. Then it becomes once every three days. And then it’s everyday that he chokes out something soft and thin and pink.

At that point, he knows it’s time to tell Roadhog.

Roadie doesn’t say much of anything when Jamie tells him that his time is running short, but Junkrat just knows that he’s worried. Their professional relationship has been going on for a several months now, and it seemed like maybe they were actually getting to know one another… It’s a loss in itself knowing that he won’t get to bust the hard shell open, but Jamie was never so delusional to think that they would have years together. He's grateful for what he got out of it.

Roadhog does insist that he see the medic.

Junkrat goes begrudgingly.

“It’s not flesh.”

Jamie raises a suspicious eyebrow.

“It’s pink and it’s coming out of me. What else would it be?” he gripes.

“Well, it’s nothing that’s been seen here for a good long while. Not since before the omnics laid waste... You know what a flower is?”

“Seen ‘em in tattoos, yeah. Weird bright things with the barbs.”

The man smiles condescendingly.

“Ya got ‘em growing in ya. This sort of thing was wiped out with the radiation. Could be that ya’ve got a mutated version, but it’s more likely one of yer folks had it before ya were born.” The smile spreads across the medic’s face unpleasantly. “There’s a surgery to get ‘em out, if yer willing.”

The medic brandishes a scalpel that has seen better days. Jamie’s eyes narrow at the medic, not trusting them at all. He knows Roadhog is waiting right outside, wouldn’t even be 10 seconds before he would be in here if Jamie yelled.

“What would ya want in exchange?”

“I wanna keep the roots. I’m sure I could get them to grow without yer lungs to sustain ‘em.”

Junkrat continues to eye the doctor’s rusted scalpel. Jamie was never fond of surgery… Even the shit they did with his arm and leg left his skin crawling, and that was to help him live… Just like this was apparently.

“What if I don’t get ‘em cut out?” Jamie asked.

The medic shrugged. “Ya get maybe a year and a half, but y’ll be pulling out bouquets by the one year mark.”

Junkrat didn’t know what a bouquet was, he’d have to remember to ask Roadie…

“I’ll talk it over with my bodyguard, and we’ll be back to discuss the surgery.”

Junkrat made sure not to move too suddenly as he got up and out of the room, the medic’s eyes following him the whole way. He stays calm as he limps out, and past Roadhog who was sitting on a comically small chair.

When he gets out of the cramped building and starts to feel like maybe he can breathe again, he turns to Roadhog, who had followed him out.

“Let’s blow this town.” he says immediately.

Roadie doesn’t answer, but Jamie gets it anyway.

“I’m sick of this place. I want to see what else is out there. There’s more to the world than Junkertown, and there’s more than the Outback to Australia. I want to see it.”

Jamie turns away again, and looks out over the scrapped together buildings and laughs to himself. And maybe to Roadie, too.

“I want to see it **burn**.”

And burn it does.

Jamie laughs maniacally as he lobs bombs into the barely held together buildings of Junkertown. Roadhog stands beside him, hooking the support beams of the taller shacks and watches them crumble with a tug.

Roadhog had been all too willing to burn the town to the ground. There was something about how quickly he agreed that made Junkrat think that this was maybe something he’d also wanted to do for a long time… Jamie just didn’t want to die without causing some sort of mayhem.

Looking over at his bodyguard as he laughs in the faces of those trying to stop them makes something in Jamie’s chest constrict. Jamie has no doubt that it’s the flowers settling in for the long haul.

When they’re finally chased out, Jamie is still laughing.

He looks over at Roadhog who is getting the bike ready, and smiles wide.

“Shame we couldn’t get at the Queen.” Junkrat sighs.

Roadhog grunts in agreement. Junkrat knows that Roadhog was around before there was ever a queen, and the very idea of that “no Queen” has been something Jamie would spend some nights pondering for hours. He imagines what real freedom must be like, not whatever the Queen has slapped the label on that Junkertown was buying into. Just the distribution of anti-rads meds was enough to show where the scales really fell. Kids lying in the dark allies not breathing anymore… No more hair left on their skinny corpses… Even Jamie hasn’t seen a non-placebo pill in years.

“We’ll be back.” Roadhog tells him, starting up the engine and waiting for Junkrat to scramble his way into the side car.

“Within the year, right?” Junkrat asks. “I wanna see her choke before I do.”

Roadhog looks over to him, and for once Jamie can’t tell what he’s thinking.

“Wha’s wrong?”

Roadhog turned away and revved the engine. Without saying anything more, he sped them off into the Outback and far away from Junkertown.

They cause as much chaos as they possibly can, everywhere they go.

It’s not hard. Everything they need is cheap and easy to find. Junkrat can make explosives out of what civilians consider ‘household items’. A term that Roadhog taught him and Junkrat found hilarious.

They make their names known all over Australia. Not just because Jamie found something worth more than anything else in Australia, but because they were doing something that can’t be ignored. It made Junkrat laugh with glee every time he thought about it, or saw their faces on the news, or when he burned the piles of money they claimed for their own.

It was all just paper after all.

Sure, they kept some of it. It was easier to dress as civilians and buy food. Besides, Jamie was coughing up more ‘flowers’ than before and it took more out of him than he was willing to admit. He wasn't always up to putting up a fight. So they split it all 50/50 and burned what wouldn’t fit on the bike. It was only a matter of time before they would need a bigger ride, something to hold the real good stuff.

Roadhog would stare at the flowers sometimes when Jamie went to throw them away. They were pink and budding. He once pulled a whole stem out of his throat, choking the whole way. Roadhog had actually moved to help him that time, but it passed before he could do anything about it. Jamie felt that tightening in his chest again and rubbed the feeling away, laughing it off.

The first full flower Jamie chokes out disappears at one point. He knows it was in the waste basket, and he’s worried that the maids may have ignored the the sign on their door, but nothing else is out of place. He forgets soon enough anyway.

He stumbles upon it again when they’re in Sweden a few months later. He’d been digging through Roadhog’s stuff, convinced that his favorite pair of pliers was in there somewhere when he let one of Roadie’s books fall onto the floor. It fell open to reveal a pink carnation flattened between pages.

Jamie stares at it for a long while until Roadie comes back. He wasn’t sure how long he was sitting there, it could have been hours or minutes. All Junkrat knows is that the vines are tightening around his lungs and he doesn’t understand what he’s looking at.

When Roadhog sees him there with the book open, he freezes. Junkrat stares at him and he can only assume Roadhog stares back.

He leaves again.

It’s only for a few more hours, but Jamie hurries to put everything back and paces the room with what time is left. The pliers are forgotten and Jamie is afraid that maybe he did something worse than anything else he’s done before. Usually if Junkrat does something he isn’t supposed to, Roadie makes sure he knows. With a hand on his throat or a good talking to, Jamie learns what he did wrong.

While he waits he coughs up another stem and he thinks maybe this is it. He thinks the medic lied to him and his time is up right **there** and **then**. His lungs are being squeezed and he’s choking out a fully bloomed pink orchid. The end of it is torn and ragged, like it put up a fight to leave its roots.

When Roadhog comes back this time, he finds Jamie with the flower in his right hand and his left pressed against his chest. Roadhog closes the door behind him and Jamie doesn’t know what to do. He looks at the flower in his hand and then back at Roadhog.

And then he lifts his right hand, and offers the slightly damp plant to his friend.

Roadhog takes it.

It’s pressed into the same book, and Jamie watches as Roadie binds it with a few rubber bands and it’s put away to be opened on a different day.

They run into Overwatch in America, which they really weren’t expecting. Roadhog knows about them, but they were new to Junkrat and boy… Were they _fun!_ Junkrat especially enjoyed the one who zipped around, nearly too fast to be hit by any of his bombs. Luckily for him, he had the perfect trap.

He nearly laughed himself out of his sidecar at the surprised look on her face when the trap clamped on her leg. It didn’t hurt her too bad, but it stopped her long enough for them to get away and out of sight.

But only out of her sight apparently. The earth gave way underneath them as a man bigger than Roadie slammed a hammer into the ground. They’re thrown off the bike and land hard on the ground. Roadie is okay, thankfully, but Junkrat knows his prosthetic arm is busted. He should be thankful he landed on his right side, but he figures he can be grateful later. Right now, he’s pissed. The fella with the hammer walks towards them, his steps heavy and loud.

“You’ve put up quite the fight, my friends, but now is the time to lay down your weapons and come quietly.”

Junkrat grits his teeth at that. He only has so much time left, he’s not going to spend any of it in jail if he can help it. He lets out a high pitched giggle and pulls out his detonator.

“You think so, eh?”

The girl zips up next to the man a second later, and Junkrat can see she has a slight limp where his trap got her.

Junkrat gestures to the bomb canisters strapped to his chest.

“You come any closer, I set these babies off. You think yer faster than the split second it takes to press down?” he challenges, his eyes on the girl.

Roadhog shifts next to him, and he can practically hear him telling Jamie not to try anything stupid. But Jamie’s not worried. He won’t die until the Queen does first. He’ll free the Outback in whatever small way he can.

He feels a tickle in the back of his throat, and suddenly dread fills his stomach.

The big guy shifts just a bit and Junkrat takes it for the opportunity it is. He presses the button.

The concussion mine stashed in the bike goes off, forcing both the big guy and the quick sheila in the air and away from them. Jamie and Roadie are in the air, too, but at least they know how to land properly. Once they hit the ground they’re off running, and Jamie holds his breath. Trying not to cough the best he can before they reach somewhere safer than here.

Their haven arrives in a car parked on the street.

Roadie breaks the window and Junkrat jumps through before the door can even be unlocked. He hotwires it fast as he can, which is pretty damn fast considering he only has one working hand, and slides over so Roadie can get behind the wheel.

While they’re speeding off he finally lets the breath he was holding go. He starts coughing and gagging immediately as the flowers force themselves out of his lungs.

Soon enough a dozen different flowers and several pink petals lay by his foot and Jamie is slumped back, exhausted from his coughing fit. He does his best to give Roadie a left handed thumbs up when he looks over, but it’s obviously weak.

When they reach their makeshift safe house and Jamie manages to fix most of his arm, Roadie sits him down and makes his thoughts known.

“It’s time to head home.”

Jamie almost wants to argue. He’s been having fun! More fun than he’s ever had in the Outback. But he sees what Roadie sees. Junkrat has been getting worse. He doesn’t have nearly as much energy at the start of this and they’ll end up in jail if he gets any slower. Jamie made Roadhog promise that they would go back before the year was up and he’s making good on that promise. It really is time to go home.

So they do. All the leftover cash, the piles of gold, the crown jewels, and even a few pachimaris are flown over with them. The bike is gone, but they make do with another stolen car. There will be another bike someday, Jamie just hopes he’s around to see it finished.

Everything is ready for the Queen. Their trolley is fixed up with Junkrat’s best explosives, and they’ve made themselves some pretty decent disguises. Their mission is underway, and Junkrat feels lighter than he has all year. He does his best to keep it together. No obvious giggling, no fits or fidgeting. He keeps his mouth shut and his back as straight as he can without losing his balance.

They weren’t exactly expecting the Queen to be completely alone or anything. They knew she had guards, and they were ready for that. Couple of hired hands? No problem. But the one sitting across from her wasn’t a Junker at all. Junkrat gets the vague memory of a wanted poster pinned up beside their own, but he struggles to remember and his mind is too tired to try at this point.

But it doesn’t matter anyway. There’s no turning back.

They don’t let the Queen get a word in before they remove their disguises. The look of absolute fury on her face makes it all worth it. They spring into action quickly enough, their weapons out and ready to keep her in place until the fuse is done burning.

But then the bloke who takes his fashion tips from the Grim Reaper pulls out his own guns and a firefight wages in the throne room. Junkrat enjoys himself as he keeps his aim steady on the Queen and Roadhog takes care to fire scrap at the Phantom of the Opera.

But before he knows it, Roadhog is pulling him back by his harness and they’re gunning it out of the building. Junkrat is able to glance back at the Queen who is holding her injured side and know that there’s no way she’ll get out before the bomb goes off. The other guy is nowhere to be seen. 

They make it out just in time.

The building is nothing but dust and ash when they stand there looking at it, admiring their work. Junkrat screams his laughter, jumping in celebration. Never has a plan gone so well! He looks over a Roadhog and lifts his left hand for a high five. Surprisingly, Roadhog obliges him which makes Junkrat giggle harder with glee.

“We did it! We got ‘er good!”

Roadhog nods.

“This’ll change things! We laid the groundwork, Junkertown doesn’t need **nobody** telling ‘em what to do.”

There’s silence where they are. Everyone in Junkertown was hiding in their homes, the windows shut, waiting it out until they were sure that was the only bomb to go off. Junkrat and Roadhog watched the dust start to settle.

“I wish I could be there to see it.” Jamie says, taking the opportunity to sit in the dirt.

Roadhog sits down heavily next to Jamison, looking at him, but not saying anything.

“I only got a few months now, I think…”

Roadhog lifts a hand and places it on the back of Jamison’s neck. It’s a heavy weight, and Junkrat feels like it’s keeping him on the earth while it spins. They sit there quietly for a few moments, before Jamie starts to cry. Just a few tears streaking through the dirt covering his face.

“I always knew I’d die. There’s no avoiding it.” he says. “Ya get more than 15 years, yer **lucky**. That’s just how it works... But I… I just...”

Junkrat takes a deep ragged breath, and Roadhog’s hand squeezes gently.

“I know.” Roadhog says.

Jamie hiccups quietly. His chest hurts so much, and he tries to keep his breathing even. There’s no helping it however, the coughing fit is already underway.

They scrape harder than any of the ones that came before them and Jamie can taste blood in his mouth along with the bitter tang that makes him think of poison. It’s a long time before he can properly breath, and he shakes through the whole thing. Roadhog stays next to him the whole time, his hand resting on his shoulder blades now.

When he’s done there’s the mess of pink and green sitting in a puddle of his blood. These ones are his favorite… The ones with the thorns. He wants to laugh, but his throat hurts so much he doesn’t bother.

Roadhog’s hand moves away and Jamie thinks that this is it. He’s leaving him for good… But instead a mask falls over his face and is tightened to fit his head as best it can. Through the tears and the goggles Jamie can’t see, but he wishes he could. A canister is pressed against the side and the hogdrogen fills the mask, soothing Jamie’s raw throat.

This wasn’t the first time they’ve tried the hogdrogen. It didn’t cure him before and it won’t cure him now, but… But it helps. It makes the scratches go away. Jamie doesn’t like to use it too much. Once a month is his rule. Hog has worse lungs than Jamie does, ruined in the aftermath of the Omninium, and if he doesn’t get enough of the gas he won’t make it through the night.

When Jamie gets his fill, which really means when he's about ready to pass out, he let’s the mask be removed without a fight and watches as Roadhog puts it back on himself.

After that, there’s no point in staying. They head home. Jamie picks up his flowers and takes them with him.

A week later, Mr. McSkull Face shows up with friends. They burn down the shack and Jamie and Roadie almost don’t get out in time. Roadhog hangs back inside far too long for Junkrat’s liking, and already there are people opening fire on them. Jamie isn’t in too good of shape for a big fight, but they don’t really have a choice.

Outside of the unexpected smoke inhalation and the fact that he’s been coughing up pink snapdragons all day, Junkrat hadn’t had the energy at night to properly work on his bombs, and was very nearly running out of ammo. He’d barely managed to get the one wearing too many clothes for the hot Australian sun to step in his trap when he got a bullet in his right shoulder.

Roadhog swung his hook to snag the one who shot Jamison, but was quickly distracted by Death Himself as he burst into smoke and surrounded Roadie.

“Tha’s not normal!” Junkrat managed to shout out, trying to take at least some aim at the sniper.

He wasn’t really expecting them to make it through the fight to be honest. They were both tired and Jamie already had one pegleg in the grave, there wasn’t much hope. He hoped that Roadhog would at least be able to get out of there before Junkrat’s heart monitor set off the rest of the explosives he had on his person. In truth he’d been planning to snap the wires before he went out peacefully in bed. He used to want an explosion, a big way to end it all, but he’s been so tired lately…

And then there’s this thumping noise in the distance that sounds like something he heard over a getaway ride’s radio and a plane overhead that’s definitely not from anywhere near Junkertown. Jamison recognizes the symbol as Overwatch and he’s not sure if he should be happy or not.

That blur of a girl doesn’t hesitate as she charges with her guns drawn straight at the sniper he was ready to spend his last few bombs on. A few more people drop out of the plane and the people who burned their home down are forced to retreat. Jamie lowers his launcher and falls to his knees, which causes Roadhog to run to him.

He already has a hogdrogen canister out, but Jamie pushes it away. He doesn’t need it and he’s already taken his dose for the month. Jamison is pretty sure he blacks out for a moment because when he manages to look up all the people from Talon are gone and he’s staring up at some sort of soldier. He’s just grateful that the gun isn’t pointed at him. 

“Jamison Fawkes and Mako Rutledge.” the prick says. “You two are under arrest.”

Junkrat rolls his eyes. “Fuck off.”

He stands with the help of Roadhog, who’s large hands are on either side of him, but it doesn’t matter because his chest tightens and he’s doubled over coughing out more snapdragons. They seem never ending to the point where he drops his frag launcher in favor of using his good hand to pull them out by the stem.

“Yikes, what’s wrong with you?” the girl in what looks like a pink tank asks.

“‘M dying.” Jamie answers. “Go ahead and cuff me, ya cunt. I got a good few _weeks_ left fer prison.”

Roadhog grunts low and angry at the words.

“Fuck off, ya know it’s true!” Jamie snaps at him. “Prison can’t hold ya anyway, so what are ya complaining about?”

Jamison manages to walk a few steps forward and away from Roadie, he holds out his arms.

“Cuff me, then.”

They do. Roadhog watches and nearly doesn’t let them do the same to him, but Jamison nods his head at him and he drops the scrap gun and the hook. He doesn’t let them take his book from his pocket, but makes it known he’ll come quietly.

Jamie falls asleep on the plane, and when he wakes up he has no idea where they are. It doesn’t look like any sort of jail he’s seen. They’re walked through the hanger that the plane lands in and into what looks like, to Jamison anyway, a resort.

A few hallways and an elevator ride later, they’re in a hospital.

Jamie is immediately suspicious. He turns to look at the cyclops with a gun.

“This doesn’ look like jail…”

“That’s because it’s not.” Soldier 76 says, and he turns to Roadhog. “As agreed. Our chief medical examiner is on her way up, you can wait out here while she works.”

Roadhog grunts and pointedly does not look at Junkrat when his head whips around to face him.

“Roadie, what is he talking about?”

Roadhog doesn’t answer.

“Roadie, did ya make some sort of deal? I don’ want to see some medic!” Jamie insists, taking a step towards Roadhog. “Roadie, look at me!”

Soldier 76 lifts his gun and points it at Junkrat.

“Mr. Fawkes, I need you to calm down and back away.”

Jamison ignores him.

“Roadie, tell me you didn’t make a deal with these cunts!”

Roadhog stares forward.

“Look at me! **Mako**!” Junkrat screams.

Roadhog looks at him, his eyes barely visible through the goggles.

“... You’re sick.”

Jamie shakes his head. “So what? What did ya give ‘em? The treasure? That’s both of ours!”

“I didn’t say shit about the treasure, Jamison.”

“Then what did you give ‘em?”

“Mr. Fawkes, please step away from Mr. Rutledge. You’re upset and you don’t want to do something you’ll regret.” Soldier 76 insists.

Jamie continues to stare at Roadhog as he takes a step back. He turns and looks down at his handcuffs, fiddling with the chain… They’re fairly hightech, not having a real chain between them, but a string of magnetic energy. They wait around in tense silence until the elevator dings and two women step out. One is covered in some pretty serious armor, while the other looks… Well, he’s not exaggerating when he says she looks like an angel. They both step forward, but only the one in white smiles at him.

“Jamison Fawkes? Could you please come with us?” she say in what Junkrat knows is a Swedish accent.

Jamison follows them into the next room, making sure to throw a glare at Roadhog as he goes. He’s sat in some weird chair and holographic words and numbers start to float around him. He’s not too much of an idiot to not know it’s medical jargon, but he’s fucked with what most of it means. He spots his radiation levels and he can’t help but giggle at the number in red.

“Pharah, would you mind removing his restraints? I would like to get some measurements done for his file.” the angel asks the armored woman.

She steps forward with some sort of key and the magnets fail on his cuffs, making them fall off and into her hands.

“Mr. Fawkes, if you wouldn’t mind standing to your full height for me?”

Junkrat notes the heavy fire power that’s in the room with him and stands from the chair slowly. He straightens his back until he towers over the blondie by nearly a foot, and she is very clearly not intimidated. She nods as if making a mental note, and has him turn and bend over so she can check his spine.

They go through the whole physical routine and the only time she isn’t 100% annoyingly pleasant is when she listens to him breath. She frowns and looks very serious as she switches between places on his chest to listen.

“You are aware you’re ill.” she says, and it’s not a real question.

“Hard not to be.” he tells her.

“How long have you been expelling flora?” she asks.

“I’ve been spittin’ flowers for over a year.” He cracks a grin. “First time I ever seen one if ya can believe it! Ya got ‘em all over your country, eh?”

She frowns at that. “Have you considered getting the surgery to remove the roots?”

He cackles. “Oh, so he wasn’t lying about that? Not a lot of decent surgeons in the Outback, at least none that would rather ya were alive over dead.”

“And may I ask whether you have told the object of your affections of your feelings?”

Junkrat snorts. “What the **fuck** are ya on about?”

The doctor blinks. “Were you not informed? The reason for your illness is unrequited love. It’s a rare disease, but we know enough that there are two known ways to cure it.”

“Unrequited… what? All they said was that one of my folks had it.”

“That is very likely. The strain is most commonly passed from parent to offspring, but that is not the reason the disease has acted up.”

Junkrat paused to think. He was almost certain now that the Junkertown medic was going to kill him while he was under the knife. Why else keep that kind of info from him?

“What’s the other cure? The non-surgery one?” Jamison asks.

“Well, if you confess and your feelings are returned, the roots die on their own.”

“Who am I confessing to exactly?” he asked, scratching his head.

“Well, I- I don’t know. Are you saying that you… don’t love anyone?”

Junkrat snorted. “Well, I wouldn’ say tha’. But it’s bad enough trying to find someone ya can trust, let alone-”

He stops talking. His eyes dart to the door.

“There’s no one you’ve been spending a lot of time with lately?” she keeps talking as if Junkrat’s whole world wasn’t just flipped around.

“Shit.” he says. “That’s what’s killing me? My own bodyguard?”

He stares at the doctor.

“Is that who-?”

“Yeah! _Yes!_ Him in the other room! So what, I just… Tell him? Let him know he’s been killin’ me this whole time? And it goes away, just like that?”

She sighs. “I’m sorry you’ve only just heard the full prognosis today, if you had known earlier, this may have made your decision a bit easier... You would at least have had more time to consider your options.”

“Options? Whaddaya mean? I just tell him, right? Problem solved.” Jamison insists.

“You’ve been sick for a very long time, Mr. Fawkes…” she starts slowly, and he hates that. “There are more risks involved. You can tell him, yes, but if you are rejected it could kill you immediately. I would ask that you at least be prepared for the option of surgery at that point so we can act accordingly.”

“He says ‘no’ and I’m done for? Then why not just get them out now and tell him after? It can’t kill me if it’s not there.”

The doctor almost looks sorry for him. Talking slowly and pity. The two worst things.

“If you get the surgery done… Once the roots are removed, your feelings for your bodyguard are removed as well.”

“What…the fuck? How does that even work?” Jamison asks, a bit of hostility creeping into his voice.

His tone is noted as the dark haired woman shifts her gun.

“Wha-What if he gets all _noble_ about it?” Junkrat asks, his voice more manic than hostile now. “Yeah! What if he loves me and I _know_ he loves me, but he doesn’t think I should be with him? Or! Or what if he loves me, but he’s already in love with someone else and he doesn’t want to betray that other person? What if we love each other and we just can’t make it work? What if he says _no_ , but changes his mind after? Does it… Does any of it _change?”_

The doctor had been listening patiently, but that look on her face still there.

“I’m afraid the disease is too simple. It registers heartbreak or requited love, and nothing else. Maybe if you had been made aware sooner, one those might have been valid questions, but right now…? With how deep the roots are, there’s no question if it would kill you, just a matter of if we let it.”

“So I… I’ll most likely be under the knife anyway?”

“I don’t want to discourage you from confessing. It is always the recommended way of doing this, but just in case… We can’t go on hope alone in this situation. With how far along it is, there is a very big chance of surgery be necessary.”

“So… So _when_ should I…?” Jamison’s not sure he’s fully processed the question before he starts to ask it.

“We’ll schedule surgery for tomorrow morning. I ask that you hold off on telling your friend anything before then.”

Junkrat nods, and repeats it a few times to make sure he’s got it. Tomorrow morning. Tomorrow morning. Don’t tell Roadie. Wait. Don’t tell Roadie.

Junkrat is too busy repeating to hear what else the doctor says, and before he knows it he’s back in front of Roadhog and the military’s wet dream. He doesn’t even remember that he’s supposed to be angry at Roadie when he asks how it went.

“... What?” Junkrat asks.

“The doctor. What did she say?”

“Tomorrow morning. Surgery.” Junkrat says automatically. He’s about to add on a ‘we need to talk’ but holds his tongue.

  
Don’t tell Roadie. Wait. Tomorrow morning. 

They’re led down to the cells after that, which is about when Junkrat remembers why he was mad in the first place.

“You made a deal to get me to the doctor.” Junkrat accuses, more softly than he’s accused anyone before.

“I did.” Roadhog agrees from his seperate cell. 

“What did you give them?”

“Nothing yet. There’s some things that need to be worked out first.”

“Just tell me, Roadie.”

“I agreed to join up.”

Junkrat hits one of the bars with his right hand, scuffing it, possibly even denting it a tiny bit, but the bar stays where it is.

“I thought you told me that after what happened with home-”

“Yeah. But my employer is dying. Seems like I might need somewhere to go.”

Junkrat snorts and starts pacing.

“... Did she help?”

Junkrat tugs at his hair.

“Yeah. Helped loads. Was real nice, too, for a Swedish bitch. Told me some stuff about what needs to be done.”

“...”

Roadhog doesn’t say anything else, and for once neither does Junkrat. The silence is filled with something that Junkrat can’t name, but it tastes like regret in the back of his throat. He wants to tell Roadhog. He wants him to know, he has a right to know. This kind of shit doesn’t happen in the Outback. People can’t trust back home, let alone fall in love. Junkrat wants to know what it’s like to have someone care, like he cares, about him. If anyone would be willing, if anyone would even bother trying, it would be Roadhog. More than that, he wants Roadie to feel how much Jamie cares about him.

But he has to wait. Don’t tell Roadhog. Tomorrow morning. Wait.

The next morning when they come to get them from the cells, Junkrat holds out a bouquet for their soldier friend.

“My way of saying thanks!” Jamie laughs hoarsely.

When they’re taken from him he laughs harder. He laughs and laughs all the way up to the infirmary, where the pretty blonde doctor is already prepped for surgery. She has them remove both Jamie and Roadhog’s handcuffs in a private room before leaving only their guards in the room with them.

“It’d be too much to ask for ya to turn around, eh?” Junkrat asks.

He feels the look rather than sees it under the soldier’s mask.

“Right, right. Just thought I’d ask is all.” Junkrat says, holding his hands up in defeat. “ _Right,_ so… I gotta talk. That’s what I’m here to do, I think…”

Roadie doesn’t say anything, but his head does cock ever so slightly.

“Truth is, mate, I’m scared out of my fucking **mind**.” Jame laughs. “This is the end of the line, and I only found out yesterday that maybe… Maybe there’s some form of hope. Ha! Hope, right? In our life? Our lives, I mean, of course… We don’t really share a life, we just share everything else… But that’s kinda the problem.”

Jamie can feel that sour taste in the back of his throat. He wonders if this is the last he’ll feel of it.

“Roadie, I gotta tell ya… This surgery that they got me ready for… It’s the fail safe. If this doesn’ work, if I fuck this up, that’s when they cut me open… And when that happens, I might not be the same. I might not be as… As much in your face, I guess. As dependent?”

Junkrat turns to look at Rocket Girl.

“Tha’ sounds right, right? Tha’s a good word for it?”

She nods. Junkrat claps a little for himself.

“Yeah, dependent on ya. And it’s important that ya know why, because let’s face it, I got what amounts to a 50/50 chance here. This thing that’s inside me, all the plants and flowers and shit, it’s got a name I can’t remember… _Hannah_ something… This shit don’ just happen to anyone. You gotta do a stupid thing like go and fall in love with someone.”

There’s a tickle in his throat, but he has to fight through it. He can’t just fuck this up. He hasn’t even had his heart broken yet, can’t it wait?

“And you’ll probably hate me for this, Roadie, but I gotta tell ya that it’s you. I went and did the stupidest thing and fell for ya to the point that it made me sick… And if ya don’t feel the same, it’s fine. We call the doctor and she cuts me open and the feelings go away. Ya don’t have to deal with it… But… But if ya do, ya know… Love me or something, ya just gotta tell me and then me dying becomes a non-issue. And I can’t have ya lying ta me, alright? Don’t go being a martyr or some shit to make me feel better, because I’ve been told that doesn’ work out in the long run. And I jus’... We jus’... I don’t want things to change. Yer my best mate, ya’know? And things will change either way, and I just wish I knew all this at the start-”

“Jamie.”

This was it. Jamie could feel them tightening again, feel them pushing up his throat and making his breathing ragged.

“You don’t need the surgery.”

Jamie’s mind goes blank as Roadhog reaches out a hand to him. Jamie automatically meets him, his left hand instantly dwarfed by Roadie’s. His breathing is deep and it reminds Jamie to breathe for himself. Something was rattling in his lungs, but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. Nothing but Roadhog mattered.

“Jamie… You don’t need the surgery… I _do_ love you.”

Somewhere in the back of Jamison’s mind he can feel Roadhog’s thumb passing back and forth over his left hand.

“I should’ve said something the second you told me you were dying. I wanted to when you found that I was saving the flowers… I was a coward. I didn’t want you to deal with my feelings when you were so sure it was your last year alive. You wanted to go out with a bang, so I shoved it down. I’m sorry that… All of this was my fault.”

If Jamie had any coherent thoughts he would be thinking about how his trouble breathing wasn’t the normal trouble with breathing.

“And I’m not being a martyr. I didn’t even know you knew that word.”

Cunt.

“I don’t say shit I don’t mean. I don’t say anything if I can help it, but you need to hear this. Not just because it will save you, but because you deserve to know. I’m sorry I was chicken shit. I do love you, Jamison.”

Junkrat wants to say something but he can’t. He trembles slightly. Why can’t he say anything?

“Jamison?” Roadhog sounds concerned. “Jamie, can you breathe?”

Junkrat shakes his head and hold up a hand to tell Roadie to wait. Just wait for a moment…

Junkrat turns away from him and he doubles over. He doesn’t register any of the voices talking around him, but he can register the feeling of Roadhog’s hand on his back. He gags, or at least tries to, but something solid is blocking the way. It feels like forever. He’s just waiting there for something to come out, but he can’t even cough.

His vision is dimming and he’s blacking out and this is it. He’s dying.

At least Roadie is there.

At least the bombs are disabled.

He feels Roadie’s hand on his back, grounding him to the world.

He feels something cold touch his lips and then that’s it.

Everything goes black.  
  
  


 

 

When he wakes up his throat is sore. There’s something covering his mouth and he gags on whatever is keeping his throat open. He moves his right arm to try to remove whatever it is, but his arm is too light and his stump just sort of whacks him in the face. He tries his left hand, but it’s stopped short by whatever has him tied to the bed. 

A large hand is placed on his chest to keep Jamie from flailing and the mask and tube are removed. He chokes and coughs, and for the first time in a year, nothing comes out.

Once he stops panicking he notices how well rested he feels, and how he recognizes the hand that’s gently holding him in place.

Roadhog.

Roadie.

“Mako.”

Jamison’s voice sounds as raw as it feels and he can’t help but giggle a bit for the very fact that he can hear it. He’s not dead. That’s his voice and that hand is his best friend and he’s not dead.

Jamison looks up at the masked face of his very best friend and he smiles wide.

Mako moves his hand away from Jamie’s chest and rests it on his stump instead.

“Hiya.” Jamie says. “Wha’ happened?”

Roadhog looks at the tray next to the hospital bed and Jamison can see a jar there filled with water and something that looks like a mass of tangled and knotted mutated spider legs. When he looks at it longer he realizes it looks more like an upside down tree.

“Is tha… Tha’s what was killing me?”

“Yeah.” Mako grunts.

Jamison stares at it for a few more moments. It looks dead. He wonders if that means he got the surgery done after all, but when he looks back at Mako he knows that can’t be right.

“I still love ya.” Jamie informs his bodyguard.

Mako laughs at that. It’s not the laugh he uses when he kills people and it’s not the snort he gives when Jamison says something amusing. It’s a _pleased_ sound. Jamison wonders if he’ll hear it every time he tells Mako he loves him.

“Good. I still love you, too.”

Jamie hums pleasantly at that. So no surgery then. He shifts to try and find a better position to look at Mako, but the cuffs on his left arm hinder him. He scowls.

“I’m layed up in bed, damn it! What’re they expectin’ me to do with no arm and…” Junkrat shifts his right leg. “No leg!”

“Rip out your IV.” Roadhog tells him as if it’s obvious. “The doctor will be back with 76 soon. You’ve been out for a while. They want to check if our deal is still good.”

Jamison stops squirming to think about that. They held up their end of the bargain… They helped. Quite a bit if Jamie was going to be honest about it. Which he wouldn’t be to their faces at least. Jamie wasn’t sure he was ready to start taking orders from a bunch of privileged holier-than-thou assholes, even if they did ultimately save his life.

“... Is that deal still good?” Jamison asks.

“Up to you, boss.”

Jamison giggles a bit more at that. “Boss” he says. As if they weren’t equal in just about everything that they did.

“Tell ya what, Mako.” Junkrat says slowly. Mako grunts a bit. “Let’s hear what they have to say. The second we don’t like what they’re doing, we blow this place.”

Mako’s hand moves to run over Jamie’s head, and Jamison moves slightly to lean into it.

“Can I ask ya something?” he requests.

“Yeah.”

“Why’d ya keep them? The flowers I mean.”

Mako seems to deflate somewhat at that. He takes a long pause before he brings the book out of his back pocket. He opens it up to the page where he accumulated all of the pressed flowers together. They were beautiful, even the ones with dried blood on them.

“You don’t remember what the world was like before the Omnics. The Outback wasn’t like the rest of Australia. It was still dry, still empty… But it was better. It was dangerous, but it wasn’t lifeless.” Roadhog takes a deep breath. “You remind me of what life used to be like. You never just accepted the world for what it was, you knew it could be better. The world deserved you. Deserved us...”

Roadie pauses to touch the delicate petals on the page.

“I remember where we were for each flower. Our rampage, the days we stayed in, the days we ruined everything, and the days in between… They’re important to me. The memories are important to me… And I was losing you. I think I needed something to keep with me after you were gone. And flowers… They hadn’t grown back home in so long… It took you to come around for them to come back. That means something to me.”

Jamie stares at Roadhog with his mouth open slightly. His chest was tightening, but it didn’t feel anything like before… It was almost pleasant.

“... You can burn them if you want.” Mako told him.

Jamison _really_ likes being in love with Mako.

“Can I kiss you?” he asks.

He’s never kissed anyone he loved before.

Mako shuts the book and puts it in Jamie’s lap. Jamison watches closely as Mako lifts off his mask and places it next to the book. Jamie will never get tired of seeing his face.

Mako leans in close so that their noses brush and Junkrat can feel Mako’s breathing on his lips. Jamie doesn’t want to close his eyes, but they to struggle to stay open as Mako’s thumb brushes the corner of Jamie’s mouth. Jamison leans up slightly so their lips can actually touch.

It’s the single most painless moment Jamison has ever had in his life, right up until Mako’s teeth catch on Jamie’s lip. It makes him laugh quietly before he presses more firmly to Mako.

Mako pulls back and Jamie’s eyes slowly open, savoring the tingling feeling of where Mako lips painlessly branded him.

“I’m glad you’re alive.” Mako tells him, and it is so sincere.

“Ha! Imagine that! Me, too!”

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Shabam! Please leave a comment down below, and some kudos so maybe this story will get noticed by some other people. Even if you're like "eh, it was okay, but maybe I'll just hit the back button" still leave kudos because I'm desperate to have all the work I've put into this at least a little bit recognized.


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